Snooty

Like Monica Belucci’s character in Malena who, every time she walks down the street in that small Sicilian town, gets curious—and oftentimes, lascivious—stares from people all around, I felt unsettling looks thrown my way. I am not a sultry Italian beauty like Monica, but why those glances? Do I look that odd? Is it the way I walk? Or the way I dress? Or is it because I’m the new girl whom they see walking past them every day? Abashed by the attention and at a loss on how to respond, I walked on with a snooty air—which I hoped would make me invisible but did not. The glances persisted for years.

Having grown accustomed to their glances, I’ve slowly discarded my snobby ways. I have learned that, when smiled at, it’s easier to smile back than to maintain an inscrutable face; that it feels pretty good to be greeted with friendly faces as I walk by; that it’s simpler to say hi than to pretend that I did not hear anything; that it’s refreshing to chat with the man who sells newspapers, the officer who apprehends traffic violators or the lady who sells coconuts – who all gave me insights I couldn’t have thought of; that being snooty could get really tiring. 

As I walk from home to work I now look forward to the friendly glances and hearty good morning greetings that I receive when I pass by. What used to be a source of discomfort and embarrassment now brings joy to my days.