Tuesday, December 14, 2010

Dissolution of a Family

Tuesday, December 14, 2010

It’s something that we jokingly refer to but do not really talk about. My siblings and I never dared—or cared enough—to ask how, when or why it happened. For years we knew that there was another family on the side, and we just accepted it as it is. And when my father stopped going to my mother’s place, there wasn’t any drama involved – nobody broke into tears of bitter anguish and not a word of recrimination was spoken. We shrugged it off and regarded the whole affair as an inevitability waiting to happen.

I often wonder about this seeming indifference towards the dissolution of our parents’ marriage. Our apathy both saddens and relieves me. We act as though it doesn’t concern us. And it doesn’t: Except for the youngest of us who was still in grade school then, we were already adults living our own lives when they chose to live separately. They made the decision themselves, and we, their children who were never consulted in the first place, opted to stay out of it. Their marriage ought not to have gone rancid and resentful, but—like countless others--it did. My father’s leaving restored harmony in our family. He has been out of our lives for quite some time now and we’ve been so used to it that it’s like he hadn’t been there all along.

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

everyone brings happiness in someone's life. some by staying and most by leaving! don't know who said that!

in my case i am not totally useless, i can always serve as a bad example. :)

Arti said...

Agree with that saying that anonymous gave... We must all move forward and be happy...

Loree said...

That is sad but at least, it seems your parents broke up in a very civil and sensible manner. Not all break ups are that way.

Thanks for your comments on my post. I really appreciate you stopping by and leaving such sweet words.

 
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