Monday, July 30, 2007

Inward Tranquility

Monday, July 30, 2007
Ralph Waldo Emerson once remarked:

I have heard with admiring submission the experience of the lady who declared that the sense of being perfectly well-dressed gives a feeling of inward tranquility which religion is powerless to bestow.

As I was leafing through a back issue of Cosmo and waiting for the rebonding chemicals to work their magic on my hair, I began to wonder why some women undergo all these beauty rituals - the shiny, silky hair, the flawless makeup, the perfect attire. It’s probably not purely for vanity’s sake. Rather, it’s a way of pampering ourselves or a way dealing with the banal frustrations of daily life. It’s also a way of unabashedly affirming our worth, our identities, and our idiosyncrasies as women. Contrary to popular belief, it is not for others. It is more for ourselves. It is neither about calling attention to ourselves nor about entrapping some guy out there. It is a way of taking control of how we want others to perceive us – feminine yet strong, confident and put together, nothing-fazes-me sort of women.

Is it being superficial? Probably. That is, if the woman has nothing else to offer and nothing else to worry about but her looks.

Friday, July 27, 2007

loaded

Friday, July 27, 2007
I'm so freakin' loaded with work that i have no time to write anything sensible.. (sigh)

Wednesday, July 25, 2007

women don't wage war the way men wage war

Wednesday, July 25, 2007
"Women don’t wage war the way men wage war, not at first, not unless there’s no other way. Men wage war in the open plains and deserts, donning full body armor, lugging lethal weapons. Women wage battles so imperceptibly that it’s not always clear there’s a battle at all, like tremors in the earth that you can’t quite feel it. But you may notice the wind is suddenly odd or the animals are acting funny."

- Ada Brunstein, “The House of No Personal Pronouns,” The New York Times, 22 July 2007

Thursday, July 19, 2007

insipid, feckless fools

Thursday, July 19, 2007
When we girls find it difficult to make simple decisions - whether in choosing what color of bag to buy or what to order in a restaurant - them guys find us exasperating. Us saying ikaw nang bahala really irks them. But what if it’s them who cannot decide for themselves? What does it say about guys whose decisions are always dependent upon others’ decisions? Is it immaturity or brain-inept ability? Or plain laziness to think? What insipid, feckless fools! Indecisiveness is always associated and can only be tolerated with girls – as we are oftentimes wrongly regarded as weak, whim-controlled dilly-dalliers – never with guys.

Tuesday, July 17, 2007

it's probably the timing

Tuesday, July 17, 2007
The doctor guy has been asking me out for a date – in that “quaint, Spanish tapa place” – since we first met. And that was a month ago. He’s a pretty nice guy, witty and articulate. But how come I’m not excited, let alone interested? I keep on making up excuses not to go. Is it me? Or is it him? It’s probably the timing.

Monday, July 16, 2007

A Weekend by Myself

Monday, July 16, 2007

I spent quite a nice weekend all by myself, doing things I absolutely love doing.

First, book hunting. Since I’m about to finish Hemingway’s A Moveable Feast, I set out to hunt for good reads at the nearest Book Sale shop. I cannot believe my luck! Tucked inside one of the piles of books I found Toni Morrison’s Sula, for only seventy bucks. Believing that there must be another treasure hidden in those mountains of books, I continued my hunt. And voila! I unearthed a copy of Cormac McCarthy’s All the Pretty Horses for forty bucks. This solitary and serendipitous pursuit of browsing through books is really fun!

Two, being a couch potato. I spent most of the weekend watching a pirated DVD of the first season of Heroes. Quite intrigued with all the hype about the new television series and not really knowing what to expect, I sat down and started to watch the show. From the first chapter alone, I got hooked. I watched nonstop until Chapter 8. I had to convince myself that I had to quit before I finish all 24 chapters of Season One!

Three, doing the laundry, cross stitching, doing my nails and preparing my outfits for the week – pure therapy for me.

Four, working on my school paper. This is what balances out all the fun things I did during the weekend. Nothing beats the discipline, complete concentration and sense of utter fulfillment that go with writing.

Life is good.

Thursday, July 12, 2007

What is it with guys who cannot get water for themselves?

Thursday, July 12, 2007
What is it with guys who cannot get water for themselves?

Yesterday my officemates – two ladies, a man and two boys - and I had lunch at a small canteen-style restaurant located next to our building. Considering that it’s still two days until payday, we had the usual rice topping budget meal. By the middle of the meal, I was feeling thirsty and since the waiters failed to serve water for us and the other two girls were having soda, I got up and got myself a glass of water.

The two boys were another matter. All throughout the meal, they were waiting to be served, complaining, “mabibilaukan ana ako, wala pa ring tubig.” Unable to stop the bitchy me, with eyebrows lifted, I said, “why don’t you just get water for yourselves? If you want something to be done, do it yourself.” For heaven’s sake, the table containing glasses and service water was merely three strides away from our very own table! How utterly infantile! Is it better to wait for water to be served until you die of thirst just to prove your point or to simply stand up, act like a man and get what you need?

What is with these young guys that they expect to be waited on and treated like princes?

Friday, July 6, 2007

Carla Grace

Friday, July 6, 2007
I met her in grade school. Little did I know that our friendship would last for 21 years and still counting. Through each heartache and break-up, disappointment and triumph, the ‘ups’ and the ‘downs’, in both small and big moments, she is there – a constant in this ever-changing world. Blessed with a certain balance of simplicity, tact and candor, she is the person that always keeps me grounded and pulls me back to reality. Life has been more bearable with her around.

I can still remember when we were in Grade 5, in our Industrial Arts class when, trying to reach for a ruler that fell, her chair overturned and tumbled down – with her still on it – the stairs. We were like “oh my gosh”. But surprisingly, she stood up, unhurt, with a grin on her face. Then everybody, feeling relieved, had a good laugh about what just happened. That’s how she is. Such is the strength of her character. She has this inspiring ability to get up from a fall, pull herself together and ready to go on. She doesn’t know it but I admire how effortless she makes everything look – from being a good friend, a devoted mother and wife, a sensible daughter and a responsible sister. She has reached the place I always dreamed I would be.

With her, I can be myself – devoid of any pretensions and unafraid of being judged. During one of the lowest points in my life, she told me, “mabuti kang tao. Hindi mo dapat dinaranas ‘yan.” Her simple words went straight to my heart and comforted me more than others’ gestures of sympathy. Worn out from pain, I continually gain strength from her – her unwavering reassurance that eventually, everything would fall into place; her patience in listening to all my sob stories, her untiring goal to whack me awake from the “evil spell cast upon me”; and her willingness to do battle for me whenever I am being attacked. Everytime I am being stupid (and that happens quite a lot), she tells me so – straight to my face – hurting me to spare me from further pain.

Twenty-one years of friendship. I look forward to twenty-one years more.

 
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